A New Narrative...

I've decided to start a blog…my first ever. 

So, true to the part of me that is blithe in spirit, that jumps in when inspired, I wrote what I thought was going to be my “first blog” (yes, I know, wrong terminology) the other day - a comical yet sober commentary on the Facebook “Like” button from the new independent artist’s perspective.  But then, faithful to my judiciousness, which always kicks in after the “spark,” I sent it to a few trusted souls for their discretionary input.  That’s when my expert friend graciously shared blog terminology and protocol with me…

It was then I discovered I hadn’t written a “blog,” I had written a “blog entry” – one of many that will make up my “Blog.”  I also learned that one should write an introductory “blog entry” to introduce oneself and identify what their “Blog” will be about (though, this seems painfully obvious now).    

I have to laugh a little because I really don’t like introductions with the formal “blah blah’s” and cursory “what do you do’s”… I like to jump straight to the “who are you? ’s” and “what do you think? ’s” and if we are so inspired, the “what can we do about it?’s”.  However, I also like to do things right.

So, here’s the scoop.  I was professionally (well, that’s an understatement – I was mind, body, heart, and soul) a musician and Worship & Arts Director for the church for most of my “adult” life.  I had found a very meaningful way to have a stable music career with a lifestyle that would be cohesive to a family life, and indeed, I felt called.  That was my story line – traditional upbringing, college, masters in music, employed, married, in the process of planning a family, offer in on a new home… and then – WHAM - my thirty year old husband died suddenly and … I was off book…

Maybe that’s why I don’t like introductions, or worse, outlines… They are labels and synopses that can change... and hopefully do.  Let’s all pray that there’s more to be discovered in this lifetime than what our minds can identify in a few words or pre-plan in an outline. 

So, can I do this introduction right without “telling” you who I am?  The best I can tell you is that I am… recreating.  I felt called to venture into the world, outside the walls of the church, to drop the salary, the pension, the insurance; to create a new narrative – one of an independent artist choosing to step out and share her voice.  I don’t know the play-by-play, or even the over-all plot, but I know this isn’t dress rehearsal.  I know I’ve jumped off the cliff, and some days I discover there’s something there to hold me and other days I find I’m flying.  Both are good practice.

Can I do this introduction right and not actually “identify” what this Blog will be about?   It will be full of snapshots and ponderings, and likely a lot of laughing at myself in this new narrative -- one artist in a sea of millions who feels called to share whatever small insights she might have along the way as she meets others, face-to-face in the midst of their own story, with a compassion gained from loss, a joy gained from healing, a wisdom that this isn’t dress rehearsal, and a humility gained from realizing she is not always in control.

Welcome to my new narrative… I hope you will be a part of it, as much, I hope to be a part of yours… Ultimately, I hope it will be a narrative human enough to be “ours.”